April 2010
3 posts
4 tags
Them There are Fightin' Words: Author-Author... →
Mega-offender: Ernest Hemingway.
2 tags
Rave Against the Machine →
5 tags
There is a beer in Germany that takes 7 minutes to... →
As I was driving from Frankfort to Louisville Saturday, I geekily listened to this show on NPR about Europeans and their beer cultures.
Fun fact: Scandanavians toast with the word “Skol,” meaning skull. Why? might you ask. Well, obviously because they drank beer from the heads of their decapitated enemies. Duh. Thanks, NPR.
June 2008
12 posts
“BOY GEORGE WINKED AT ME.”
– Me to everyone I know after Boy George winked at me and waved goodbye to me at a party
Paris Blogpost One:
I am not going to write about Paris. I will put up pictures and short captions later tonight. But I liked it too much to write about it in my thematic sardonic manner.
I am so Po-mo right now.
“This is Moby.”
– MOBY. ON THE PHONE. WITH (LITTLE OLD) ME.
Amendment: Moby is not as big of a tool over the phone (for ten minutes) as his media persona would suggest.
Iceland hates Polar bears. THEY ARE AN ENDANGERED... →
“Oh yeah. That happens from time to time. You’ll see them pulling them out...”
– Jan, who explained to me why the police finding a WWII bomb that hasn’t detonated is not as cool as I thought it was
Bring your teacher to work day
In high school, I never thought I would be as embarrassed to be seen with a middle-aged white guy than my dad at junior orientation because I was younger than everyone else and couldn’t drive myself there.
Little did I know, more horrifying than parent-teacher conferences and more embarrassing than holding an adult’s hand when crossing the street is your teacher coming to visit your...
SATC Revamped
Much to my surprise and general amazement, my editor informed me today that the four of us (girls) should dress up like different characters from Sex and the City and recreate a chick-flick night affair, complete with shoe shopping in posh Chelsea (which the company will not pick up the tab for) and a night of clubbing Cosmopolitans in hand (which the company will pick up the tab for).
They had...
This is the worst news I've heard all summer. →
Waiting for Moby; No brothel; GBDB (Or, Bald men,...
Moby cancelled yesterday’s interview for ‘personal reasons’. The fact that it is noon there when it is 5pm here makes me think that reason was typical intellectualite wannabe DJ (i.e. ‘I am hungover.’) Supposedly, the bald vegan will make contact with me on Thursday. If this were not a vaguely famous person, I would be all, ‘Oh hell to the naw.’ But since...
“Lindsey, do you know Moby?… Look at your face. Do you want to interview...”
– Lorraine, just before I found out… I GET TO INTERVIEW MOBY.
Take the Castles; America's got my fairytale.
Yesterday, I went to see Canterbury Cathedral and Leeds Castle. Big whoop. Here is the most cathartic experience I’ve had whilst in London. That’s right. I love Sex and the City. I wish I were Carrie Bradshaw. I will not spoil the movie for anyone, but I am so happy for so many reasons right now. Much like the Les Mis/Harry Potter post, sad + happy = magic. First half: I bawled like a...
May 2008
41 posts
“That’s not football anyway. That’s Ah-mEHr-ican football. Why...”
– Culturally insensitive kid talking to his mother about American printmaker Joseph Vogel’s “Football” in front of a genuine, Super Bowl-watching, Orange Bowl-rooting American
Great Expectations met
Who thought I’d learn to love American art whilst in England? Okay, well, not exactly learn to, but, you know, remember that I did in the first place. But, I did find out I really like George Bellows. And I only found out about him about 80-90 years after everyone else. He was a satirist (shocking). Also today I found time to finish my book in a little deli near the British Museum. I...
Update: Brothel Raid
I never thought I’d live to see the day that I invaded a brothel (I might not yet, I still have to make it to Monday). I am going with a senior reporter and the creepiest photographer, Rorye, I have ever met, along with some of my closest police friends, to raid a brothel. Hopefully there will be drugs (and where there are drugs, there is Amy Winehouse… my dream!) so we can bring dogs...
I survived Gloria Gaynor*-style
After meeting a Carribbean woman wearing a pink cowboy hat with sequins, dodging a certainly unfortunate ride on the back of a motorcycle, a drug dealer, and several ‘dodgy’ men, I stepped onto the Bakerloo platform at Willesden Junction. This means that I did not get fatally shot. I actually didn’t get shot at all. And because I wore my bullet proof vest, I deflected any and all...
Out of the Office, into the World
Finally. Out of the office. One interview at a convenience store this morning and now in the scary ghetto at a cultural centre (or -er for non ex-pats). In fact, when giving me directions, someone said, ‘Oh, you know. Where that shooting was a couple weeks ago.’ Brilliant. First and last time out. If I make it back, they are sending me on police raids and tomorrow to an American art...
From Van Gogh to Kylie Minogue
When I woke up this morning, it was raining. So I went back to bed. When I woke up again, it was still raining. In London, going back to bed does not make the rain disappear. So, I made the executive decision to get out of bed. And that’s what great Americans do- make great executive decisions. A big group of us went to the National Gallery in trafalgar Square. It was here that I saw...
The Kentucky of England
Yesterday we went to visit one of Jane Austen’s houses. While I am not the biggest Jane Austen fan there ever was, and much prefer learning about her love life, or James McAvoy*, getting out of the city and getting to see the countryside was the best idea I’ve participated in for a long time. Alton and Chawton Village, like south central KY, harken back to slower life with yards and...
“HAHAHAhahahahahaHAHAhahaha.”
– English people when Katie and I went to the right side of the mini-bus (i.e. van) to get into the passenger seat
Cheers: A Night of Taking That and Taking That...
A mere three weeks into my internship, I found myself again at a pub. But this time was even better because it was used as an American initiation. To get there, we traveled through a gigantic cemetery, which is not uncommon. They just bury people anywhere here. (SO ENGLISH RIGHT NOW!) This included three jugs of Pimm’s cocktails, promises (free Sex and the City viewing Tuesday morning! and...
Indiana Jones. The movie. The experience.
The Leicester Square Odeon Theatre, the London center for movie premieres. It has leopard print seats. It has two curtains in front of the screen. It has a balcony. It has ushers that walk you to your seats. People clapped before and after the movie. All in all a classy affair. I will not reveal any plot because I feel like there would be backlash. But I will say, hoorah for Shia LaBoeuf. Hooray...
It's coming.
7pm (or 2pm to all the important people). Have I ever seen an Indiana Jones film? No. Does this matter? Seeing as it is a cultural upheaval the likes of 1968? No. I’m bringing a camera, and I hope people are ridiculous and dressed up.
MANCHESTER UTD WINS!!!
So, I don’t know much about sports. Fine. Basically, I root for U of L, or I wait until the end of the season and pick a team based on something arbitrary (colors, which players look like they need more sympathy, my boss tells me too, etc). That’s when the games actually get exciting. And, theoretically at least, you have the top teams with the top athletes (especially in this...
Harrison Ford deforests himself; The Guardian... →
This generally shows the hype that IS Indiana Jones in London. Also, it shows Britain supporting sexually ambiguous men. Harrison Ford? No chest hair? Please stop chopping down trees.
“America would not let this happen!”
– Natalie, right after the Get Naked! show and right before the Brazilian waxing on TV. Right now, it feels pretty painful to be a woman.
On myyy oowwwwn... Tonight in brief.
The blurriness just symbolizes the movement of the jungle. Exhibit A: I laughed. A play about revolution, sacrifice, love and bein’ hot. And no, it’s not Jesus Christ Superstar. Exhibit B: I cried. (Okay, not really but I could have if I wanted to). Yes, Muggles, it exists. Exhibit C: Magic. That’s right: laughter + tears = magic. Things I have learned: -I’m supposed...
Ravenclaw roxenclaw →
The Fonz pants
There is a man at work, Alex Wellman, a senior reporter, who made everyone in the office feel his pants today. This is because once he was on the same bus as Henry Winkler (or, at least, I assume Henry Winkler, since he said “The Fonz”). As soon as Winkler got up, Wellman sat down in his spot. He hasn’t washed his pants since, allegedly. Now he just says “Eyyy” a lot...
News Flash: I don't speak English
At my second news meeting, where I was reminded that a dog bite story was genius but they hoped I was happy with my story about the Home Secretary’s plans, I encountered my first serious language barrier. “So, uh, Lindsey, what are your news ideas for this week?” “….and a children’s gala (GAY-la) in Westminster Park.” “I’m sorry what?”...
London looks like London again.
My rain dance worked. Finally.
“You’re asleep, and someone could come in here. I’m not saying they...”
– The large Jamaican woman who was in my apartment when I woke up and gave me my mail.
British Television
After a long day of work and class, and what Natalie has diagnosed as “the flu,” but I still deny, I’m lying on the couch watching TOP 50 Boyband Classics!* on the hits channel. No. 5- New Kids on the Block, “Hangin’ Tough” This describes my life. Thanks, Joey McIntyre and south Boston! No. 4- Wham, “Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go)” This says...
Lost suits me.
Today we got lost again. We looked for actual gardens, because when I hear garden - silly me - I think flowers. Covent Garden provided me with the best chocolate… ever. So glad I got lost number one. I saw gigantic peacocks there as well. I don’t really know how that could be anything but amazing. Abbey Road. Does walking across that and stopping traffic for a picture make me a...
“Bon chance!”
– Me on my first time using French for an actual purpose: to talk to a LIVE FRENCH PERSON who was trying to take pictures of her barefoot LIVE FRENCH HUSBAND walk across Abbey Road.
Language Barrier affects English Cuisine: A story...
We ordered sausages and expected them to be similar to Beenie Weenies. Instead, we got this: Clearly, “sausage” does not translate. These babies look like the primitive Brits just slaughtered them behind the bar before attempting to make them into balloon animals. So, the tasting process was… well, a process. Step 1: Dowsing animal parts in a ton of BBQ sauce (this word...
Where are the Stones, Clapton, and the Beatles?
I don’t know. The only music on TMF (their version of MTV) is R & B and hip hop music that was popular in the States in January. This was first realized last night in the clubs (although I did appreciate the DJ’s choice to play the Milkshake song over “Holiday” and “Coming Out”). It is being confirmed by the UK top 40.
Feminist who?
Tonight I paid 45 dollars to dance in front of older males and be groped while sipping on my 19 dollar drink, which didn’t taste good enough or have enough alcohol to be worth 19 dollars. However, this did not seem to curb my enthusiasm. My new friend, Damon (or Devon?), after informing me that I sound English (which I definitely do not), tried to explain sarcasm to me. I didn’t get...
A girl with high expectations: My first night...
I came all across the ocean to party, and I better get it done right, UK. Help me out/ beware. Look at those come hither eyes, beckoning you to dance just like your parents in 1974. Disco can’t be dead if the rich and famous love it! (Which they must, since they are European, and according to my French text book, still use the word “discotheque.”) The woman wears feathers and...
Falling down and letting handsome Brits pick me...
Today was my first actual day of work, although, if I didn’t have a passport meeting tomorrow, I would leave work at 4:30 to attend pub, which is like British prayer, but more social and less likely to allow Irish people (who supposedly drink more than the English). After making an “ahss” (I haven’t heard anyone say “arse” yet, but I am now an expert on the...
Emo: The epidemic is now a noun! Blame it on My... →
Gun Crime Explained to the Only American (Or...
Day 1 of work. I am not dead yet. I did not even come close to dying, except maybe crossing the street. I will be going on a police raid some time this summer, playing the part of gun-toting American (sans gun). Class*! After luckily picking up a briwiant (i.e. brilliant, true UKers are too class for double “L”s) phone call for what could be a class! feature, my bosses informed me that...